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» Narcissistic Personality Disorder
Narcissistic Personality Disorder Index of /recordings
Studies: "Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), despite substantial interest from a theoretical perspective, has received very little empirical attention (1). In fact, some have concluded that “most of the literature regarding patients suffering with narcissistic personality disorder is based on clinical experience and theoretical formulations, rather than empirical evidence” (2; p. 303). A large majority of empirical studies on narcissism come from a social-personality psychology perspective which, while methodologically sophisticated and important, may not pertain to Narcissistic PD given the reliance on undergraduate samples and the use of the Narcissistic Personality Inventory"
Refining the Construct of Narcissistic Personality Disorder: Diagnostic Criteria and Subtypes Am J Psychiatry 2008; 165:1473-1481 "An emerging literature also supports the long-held clinical hypothesis that there are two subtypes of narcissistic individuals, grandiose and vulnerable (5–11). The former has been described as "grandiose, arrogant, entitled, exploitative, and envious" and the latter as "overly self-inhibited and modest but harboring underlying grandiose expectations for oneself and others" (5, pp. 188–189). The two subtypes have different correlates with external criterion variables, supporting the validity of the distinction (see reference 10, for example)"
Narcissistic Personality Disorder: Relations with distress and functional impairment Joshua D. Miller, Ph.D., Univ of Georgia, Athens, GA 30602 "However, the relations between NPD and psychological distress were (a) small, especially in concurrent measurements, and (b) largely mediated by impaired functioning. NPD was most strongly related to causing pain and suffering to others, and this relationship was significant even when other Cluster B personality disorders were controlled. These findings suggest that NPD is a maladaptive personality style which primarily causes dysfunction and distress in interpersonal domains. The behavior of narcissistic individuals ultimately leads to problems and distress for the narcissistic individuals and for those with whom they interact."
Grandiose Narcissism Versus Vulnerable Narcissism in Threatening Situations:
Emotional Reactions to Achievement Failure and Interpersonal Rejection
( Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology, Vol. 29, No. 8, 2010, pp. 874-902 )
Narcissism and Levels of Social Competence Undergraduate Research Journal for the Human Sciences ISBN 1-929083-13-0 Volume 8 - 2009 Because social competence affects the well-being of individuals, an understanding of how personality traits affect relationships seems to be quite important. Bennett (2006, p. 52) stated, “Narcissism is embedded in attachment relationships from infancy,” linking traits of selfism to the ability to form interpersonal relationships. This study seeks to discover whether a correlation exists between narcissism (a psychological disorder characterized by selfish tendencies) and social competence (the skills required to form close interpersonal relationships). This study hypothesized that as a person exhibits higher levels of narcissistic tendencies, the ability to form close relationships declines.
Sanctuary for the Abused, In Memoriam of Joanna Ashmun and Kathleen Krajco: This website and blog share my observations and understanding of malignant narcissism. Being a writer, I feel that I should use my ability to describe and explain things in a way that is clear and meaningful to the average person. So, here you find many examples of narcissistic behaviors and learn why your normal behavior yields anti- results from people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), why they are predators compelled to abuse and slander vulnerable prey, and why they react so backwardly to things. My aim is to contribute what I can to the formal understanding of NPD and to help those victimized by a narcissist understand what is going on. I am no expert. These are just the observations and reasoning of one who has had long experience with narcissists and knows others with such experience. So, I can't give you counseling or personal advice. I have no credentials. This publication isn't intended as professional advice of any sort. Narcissists Suck by Anna Valerious ( and My Two Cents on NPD Being Removed from the Newest DSM V)
Putting Yourself Last:"Martyrs are seldom happy. More often, they are angry, bitter, resentful, depressed and burned out. This is not to say that you should not consider others and be thoughtful in meeting their needs. But having a healthy relationship involves factoring your own needs and desires into the equation. You teach people how to treat you, and if you act like a doormat, you can’t completely blame someone if they wipe their feet on you. Learn how to stand up for yourself, practice assertive communication, ask and allow others to meet your needs, and take care of yourself as much as you take care of your loved ones."
The Savior Complex: "If you are under the misconception that you could someday fill the attention-cup of the narcissist it is time for a reality check. There is no filling their vast reservoir. You can labor intensively for the rest of your life only to find yourself being condemned by the narcissist for never doing anything for them. (I'm betting you've already heard the narcissist say something like this.) At some point they will push you to utter hopelessness if you have insisted on clinging to the hope that you could ever be enough for them. My advice? Give it up now. Don't wait to hit the dregs of despair. Take that as sage advice from the voice of experience...because that is what it is."
When Winning Becomes More Important than Seeking the Truth Male Victims and Children Suffer "At times, perpetrators of family crimes are able to fool authorities and others into believing that they are victims. These perpetrators pose as victims for several reasons; to seek retribution against an intimate partner for leaving them, to cover up the fact that they are the abusive partner/parent, to get custody of the children in a divorce, and/or to prevent the real victims from the getting assistance and support.
A perpetrator that is validated as a victim can wield a tremendous amount of power over their victim, especially if the perpetrator is a woman. Female perpetrator/victims have the ability access to free victim and legal services and all the support they need to continue the charade"
"A learned fool, yet even more a fool,
is still infinitely better than a totally ignorant one" ( Social Anxiety Forums )
Voicelessness and Emotional Survival:"Many people spend a lifetime aggressively trying to protect an injured or vulnerable 'self.'" This is a rare, I suspect not too stumbled upon concept that not only offers one insight into a narcissist's inner workings but also the deliberate methodology they employ in silencing, infecting as it were, another's innate God given opposition to such horrific treatment as the narcissist seeks to reduce their target victim down to their own level of despair.
Imagine living in a world where the most important people in your life couldn't hear you---- your thoughts, feelings, wishes, or intents. For most, this is the stuff of nightmares or Twilight Zone-like science fiction. But if you grew up with narcissistic parents, or live with a narcissistic spouse or partner, this world is very real. You know what it is like to be voiceless . . . ( more )
"In the past, we have accepted "Dagwoodism" as amusing, but relatively harmless behavior. That it shows up as a stereotype in the funny papers is an indication of what a widespread phenomenon we are dealing with. Everyone smiles and nods in recognition. Many, many people relate to it in a personal way, and it sells comic strips. So why rock the boat by saying such folks are actually sick and need help?
The truth is, people who silently endure the invisible illnesses may not recognize what unclaimed power they have. The opportunity to ease their own suffering and the suffering of others is immense, should they begin to validate themselves, an seek appropriate support and medical attention" ( for himself? Or the "lovable" tormentor who in fact is extremely abusive to him instead?)
Sanctuary for the Abused, Narcissists & Conflict"One simple but easy-to-forget thing about narcissists is that, unlike normal people, they don't mind conflict. They enjoy it. Conflict makes normal people uncomfortable. We try to minimize it in our dealings with others. Oddly, we love it in fiction (Conflict is the gunpowder of fiction, and it's near relative - controversy - is the gunpowder of journalism. Maintaining constant conflict is the secret to storytelling success). But note that this is "safe" conflict. In real life we hate what we love to see characters go through in fiction.
Narcissists have a whole different attitude toward conflict. They use it strategically to manipulate. They seek conflict. They become impossible people, flying into conflict with you over anything you think, say, do, feel, or wear. As if THEY have the right to determine what you say, think, do, feel, or wear. This isn't just arrogance." . . . More info at: narc-attack.blogspot.com
Recordings #77, #19, #18 and #14 are short, less than three minutes each and only small sampling of *refused to be heard* evidence listed here (also click "Show Recordings" below)
#14 Accusations & Threats (03:00 min) “divorce & entitlement” / referring to Feb 1st, 2005 where Judge E B S awarded him the kids (3/17/05) even prior to being interviewed & cleared of “aggravated assault” charges (3/23/05)
#18 “You Get Off” “F^^k You! Get Away From Me” (01.45) Her early AM bus stop screaming and swearing in front of daughter MH who is pleading “mommy, my bus is coming, stop” and “you are embarrassing me”.
#19 “Leave me alone” (01:52) Another classic example of her physical violence (brandished something then busted it on ground) and screaming “get away from me” (I am nowhere near her) in deliberate attempt to disturb neighbors into calling police and hopefully arresting ME!
#72 Homework Time & More Swearing with Kids (03:20) “No! You aren’t doing anything with him” (deliberate Parental Alienation / see early #73 as well)
#73 Ref: “You were going away, remember?” “I wished I had finished you off when I had the chance” (07:56) More Georgia spontaneous swearing, kids present when he finds clerks copy of her divorce service papers blowing in driveway. The above statement (relevant discussion begins at 03:30), the only physical / “inadvertent” evidence that New York had against me, was in point of fact a REGRET (also?) made later during alleged “no post-arrest questioning” (no Miranda writ) in conx with the booking officers’ casual inquiry about “date of prior” which, my having none & him finding none, explains why they took forever (worrying they’d made a mistake?) and were obviously “phishing”. In not knowing at the time for sure where their question was originating from (her or computer) and assuming they were talking about her BLACKMAIL of me and our 2005 divorce proceedings (and rather than answer directly at all with a 02/01/05 date) I, apparently loud enough, pondered (more to myself than them) a statement which they, in turn, also took completely out of context in terms of the actual question that they themselves were asking!
#77 “I’m Not Giving Up These Kids” (silence after 02:15) Physically attacks Him / screaming / accusing me of not keeping secrets from her family (who also detest her!)
#83 “I Need a Cup of Coffee” (29:51) 10Oct09 actual incident (with same day Sheriffs’ report who angrily concluded “self-inflicted”), upon which She “Exparte Petitioned” to County Judge L on 12Oct09 and complained “push me down in driveway” (& 09/29/10 “fractured front teeth” demanding “pay for dental”) and which resulted in yet another “No Visitation” for another entire month making four(4) TPO imposed, forced parent / child separations Endured & Honored by me for a total of 197 days (GA69, NY84, GA30, GA14)
1 Corinthians 7:25 25 Now concerning [5] the betrothed, [6] I have no command from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who by the Lord's mercy is trustworthy. 26 I think that in view of the present [7] distress it is good for a person to remain as he is. 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman [8] marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that. 29 This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, 30 and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, 31 and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away.
32 I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. 33 But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34 and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. 35 I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.
Recording #s are time sequential with Duration & General Topic Listed
(#05 thru 88 recorded between Sept 12th and Oct 11th, 2009)
#08 10:37 "Go get away I'll call police" swearing outrageous accusations "i should have finished you off" referring to dr comment on my psychiatric evaluation / telling me to "get a divorce" / money [DELUSIONAL]
#12 11:59 dent on car / 2hr "takeout" chicken dinner "Kids & homework" *swearing* dying wish? her talking about divorce again / "over my dead body" / (son in background "hey") / ref to 2003 dfcs apt / eval again [REPETITIVE]
#14 03:00 Accusations/threats -> "swearing" divorce topic again outrageous accusations "your money won't buy" "you won't get the kids" "you wanna be in control" BLACKMAIL
#17 03:49 "You don't even look at me" (she starts) Early AM/time for kids school "tired of being screamed at" "my job" (major swearing/THREATS/ref 2005 again) 02:30 miss bus? [michelle] "stop screaming at each other"
#19 01:52 "leave me alone" attempting removal of cloths blocking outside front door "get away from me" (typical example of screaming/swearing/smashing so neighbors can hear?)
#20 20:20 nagging/dictating "pushing buttons" divorce again/threats / [ENTITLEMENT] ref NewYork /smashing/attacts me coffee spilt [09:]/complaining "leave me alone" [12:]
"disappear with kids" "youll never see them" leaving, using kids to punish me [15:] busting things up "try to stop me" cookie man??? threats [19:] her throwing things
#28 07:35 "why you going outside" (kids are home) "I'll find a apt" 01: "and then you'll lose your house" "and I'll go my merry way" talking about out of state restraining order/turning me out [stop 02:00] "we don't belong together"
#32 25:03 After church apt shopping/"temporary" to "clean out house?" Obviously wants own place at my expense . . . "04:00 "for the price of one months rent I can finish what I started" (shed) 05:10 "house too small" "you don't even work" "i'm going to leave if you do not do something"
#69 16:39 [kid's talking, present] "get out of my life" her talking about divorce, house, my paying *swearing* ref to "fuc faggo friend" "get out get out"
#73 07:56 swearing w/children present [attacking/mistaken accusations] "i'm willing to share kids" NY ref: [04:30] "i wish i had finished you off when i had the chance"
See Georgia TPO temp child custody award from 2005 divorce! I know WHAT and WHY I said what I did (see transcript HERE) and that which YOU HEARD are obviously two totally different things!
#75 34:58 her swearing with kids present (starts up/same themes/my silence/"school bus is coming" / threw comet bleach @ me) / [son] "your not even saying anything"
#81 22:01 referring to 2005 incident "i could have put your a away" / talking about taping[17:] asking me to promise i "won't use it", "deceitful"? personal? son in background, "he can cry all he wants"
#83 29:51[/B] 10/10 sheriff incident date (can start play at minute 18:00) - "can i have five dollars pls" early morning screaming about "needing coffee" w/children present
#85 11:43 same morning/Me talking to kids about shopping/cake for son's party 02:15 daughter talking about getting "friend"/does not come because of me now picking up? 03:30 "hre mother waiting for us" [phone ringing] 04:05[daughter] "friend can't go" "why" "because her mom won't let her go with you" "great" "obviously talking to her mother too much" 05:50 "friend can't go because . . 06:30 kids and I leaving for party [son] "it's 1100 oclock" "we gotta go" [wrapping packages] 09:00 "bye mom" 10:05 [wife talking from bedroom] 10:45 "are you alright?"
#88 2:55:36 10/11 incident report (Lady Sheriff) On phone with Sheriff dept (not 911) [B]begin 17:15[/B] "you disconnected me" 18:25 "I'm leaving" [me]"lets get the sheriff here" "best way to approach it, don't you think?"
Have Anti-Father Family Court Policies Led to a Men's Marriage Strike? ( "He could be one of those fathers . . ." pretty much says it all! "It's a shame," Dan says. "I always wanted to be a father and have a family. But unless the laws change and give fathers the same right to be a part of their children's lives as mothers have, it just isn't worth the risk." )
God hates divorce, but Himself divorced and remarriedJeremiah 3:6"The Lord said to me in the days of King Josiah: “Have you seen what she did, that faithless one, Israel, how she went up on every high hill and under every green tree, and there played the whore? 7 And I thought, ‘After she has done all this she will return to me,’ but she did not return, and her treacherous sister Judah saw it. 8 She saw that for all the adulteries of that faithless one, Israel, I had sent her away with a decree of divorce. Yet her treacherous sister Judah did not fear, but she too went and played the whore"
Ezekiel's Call & Warning to Israel 3:24
Then the Spirit came into me and raised me to my feet. He spoke to me and said: "Go, shut yourself inside your house. 25 And you, son of man, they will tie with ropes; you will be bound so that you cannot go out among the people. 26 I will make your tongue stick to the roof of your mouth so that you will be silent and unable to rebuke them, though they are a rebellious house. 27 But when I speak to you, I will open your mouth and you shall say to them, 'This is what the Sovereign LORD says.' Whoever will listen let him listen, and whoever will refuse let him refuse; for they are a rebellious house.
Ezekiel 20:30 “Therefore say to the house of Israel, Thus says the Lord God: Will you defile yourselves after the manner of your fathers and go whoring after their detestable things? 31 When you present your gifts and offer up your children in fire, [3] you defile yourselves with all your idols to this day. And shall I be inquired of by you, O house of Israel? As I live, declares the Lord God, I will not be inquired of by you. 32 “What is in your mind shall never happen—the thought, ‘Let us be like the nations, like the tribes of the countries, and worship wood and stone.’
"Betrayed and wronged in everything,
I’ll flee this bitter world where vice is king,
And seek some spot so special and apart
Where I’ll be free to enjoy
My Only Two Honest Sweet Hearts!"
(all verse by Le Misanthrope Jean-Baptiste Moliere 1666)
On the Subject of Attorneys: "The odds are 9 out of 10 that any attorney you encounter will be an incompetent, ignorant, arrogant, money grubbing, south-end of a northbound donkey"
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